There I Stood

There I stood.

Despite the education received in the Personal Growth class from my Catholic High School;
Despite the admonishments from my father concerning becoming “whipped”;
Despite the late bloom I would realize when it came to experiences with the opposite sex;

There I stood.

One month removed from my twenty-first birthday;
Six months away from gaining a four-year college degree in three years;
Ten months after having moved in with my first college girlfriend;

There I stood.

After crying when she first told me;
After attending every doctor’s visit with her along the way;
After months of empathy breathing in weekly Lamaze classes;

There I stood.

Having just seen the X-rays of a fetus in the breech position;
Having just called the doctor to announce her water had broke;
Having just gotten lost on the way to the hospital;

There I stood.

In a hospital cap and gown;
In a maternity surgery room;
In a state of unencumbered fear and anticipation;

There I stood.

Ready or not … There I stood.

And now, thirty-five years later,
I still stand here,
In love with the daughter they gave me to hold back then,
When I knew not …
Where I stood.


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